I discovered something this past weekend: I'm a kind person, but I'm definitely not a nice person. I say this because I've actually thought all the things below (MEAN), but (most of the time) I never actually say them (nice?):
1. Your baby is so cute - I'm shocked!
2. You're so brave... for wearing that in public.
3. It's not you, it's me. I really, really hate you.
4. At your age you shouldn't be wasting time having arguments with random strangers about who bumped your elbow, who was on line first, or who should get out of your way on a jampacked train. Unless that's what you want on your obituary.
5. I love your stories. They remind me that things could be worse - I could be you.
6. You are a great example of why I hate people and love animals.
7. If everybody got what they deserved, you'd be under a tank right now.
8. I was just wondering what you'd look like ... at the bottom of a flight of stairs. After I pushed you.
9. Thank you for proving my argument that, for some people, birth control should be mandatory. For example, your parents.
10. Blowing your head off wouldn't change anything. It's not like you use it.
Insert your own here. Or don't. And get your own blog.
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